Season 16

1966–1967

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E1. How to Succeed in Loafing Without Really Trying

Sep 13, 1966 · 60m

E2. Eenie Meenie Minee Schmo

Sep 20, 1966 · 60m

Sketch: Clem Kadiddlehopper graduates as a fortune teller and helps change Mickey Rooney luck. Music: Simon and Garfunkel sing, 'I am a Rock' and 'The Dangling Conversation.' Silent Spot: Red touchingly pantomimes a man's last day on the job after 60 years, and his difficulty in actually leaving.

E3. Chiseler on the Roof

Sep 27, 1966 · 60m

E4. Much Ado About Nagging

Oct 4, 1966 · 60m

E5. Mother Knows Pest

Oct 11, 1966 · 60m

E6. Land of Bilk and Money

Oct 18, 1966 · 60m

E7. It Happened One Nut

Oct 25, 1966 · 60m

E8. What Did You Do in the Dump, Daddy?

Nov 1, 1966 · 60m

E9. A Gyp Off the Old Block

Nov 15, 1966 · 60m

E10. The Best Money a Sheriff Can Buy

Nov 22, 1966 · 60m

Sketch: Sheriff Deadeye and western dandy the Handkisser (Jack Jones) scheme to steal a gold statue that the sheriff's grafting cronies are planning to erect in honor of his 20th year in office. Music: Jack Jones sings "All I Need is the Girl," "A Day in the Life of a Fool" and "People Will Say We're in Love." The Silent Spot: Red reprises his routine about a drunk gentleman trying to get in his front door after a long evening of partying.

E11. Jerk Be Nimble

Nov 29, 1966 · 60m

Sketch: Clem Kadiddlehopper's lighter-than-air cake recipe attracts the attention of foreign General Ruhakoff (Vito Scotti) who wants to use the recipe as rocket fuel for his country's space program. Janet Leigh appears as Clem's girlfriend, Daisy June. Music: Dionne Warwick sings "Walk On By" and "People." The Silent Spot: A burglar (Red) with a sweet tooth breaks into a drugstore soda fountain. Bill Shannon plays a policeman.

E12. Better Dead Than Wed

Dec 6, 1966 · 60m

Sketch: George Appleby (Red) is photographed by Allen Funt & Abbe Lane at a mini-skirt sales convention. Music: Abbe Lane sings a "Strangers In The Night" And "Heat Wave" medley. Silent Spot: Red does a pantomime routine as a mountain climber.

E13. The Fastest Cuspidor in the West

Dec 13, 1966 · 60m

Sheriff Deadeye is determined to get the lead role in a motion picture being made in town - even to the extent of wearing a corset to appear thinner. However, he finds he has been beaten out by Nathan Nothing (guest Robert Goulet), who is younger and more handsome. In "The Silent Spot," Red plays a crotchety old man who hates children, but finds he has been promoted to a store's toy department during the Christmas rush.

E14. The Christmas Spirit

Dec 20, 1966 · 60m

E15. The Taming of the Screw-Loose

Dec 27, 1966 · 60m

Sketch: Forsooth (Red), a bumbling medieval servant, brings deadly bad luck to the Duke de Fromage and the Marquis de Swinger, the father and son (both played by Tony Randall) of a French aristocratic family. Music: Tony Randall performs a song-and-dance to "Winchester Cathedral." The Silent Spot: Red tries to be first in line for Rose Bowl tickets in a pantomime bit with Barbara Hewitt (the 1966 Tournament of Roses Queen).

E16. In One Head

Jan 3, 1967 · 60m

E17. Freddie’s Heroes

Jan 10, 1967 · 25m

In this WW II parody, the stars of "Hogan's Heroes" (Bob Crane and John Banner) appear as their characters of Col. Hogan and Sgt. Schultz. Red (as Freddie the Freeloader) is assigned to assist in their escape from Stalag 13. In "The Silent Spot," Red plays a bungling 19th century suitor who must meet his girlfriend's parents.

E18. The Fortune Crookie

Jan 17, 1967 · 25m

E19. Absence Makes the Hate Grow Fonder

Jan 24, 1967 · 25m

George Appleby accompanies his abusive wife, Clara (guest Eve Arden), on a southwestern vacation, but the couple splits in the process. They go their separate ways, but end up staying in the same hotel room, unbeknownst to each other. In "The Silent Spot," Red plays an old man whose bumbling attempts to run a gas station end in failure.

E20. Sappiness Is Just a Thing Called Clem

Jan 31, 1967 · 25m

E21. Better Living Through Chiseling

Feb 7, 1967 · 25m

E22. A Bottle of Bumb

Feb 14, 1967 · 25m

Sketch: Christopher Columbus (George Gobel) sets sail with Forsooth Fromkess (Red). Music: British balladeers Chad and Jeremy sing "It Was a Very Good Year." Silent Spot: Red plays a star-struck car hop hoping to be discovered in Hollywood.

E23. Not With My Dump You Won’t

Feb 28, 1967 · 25m

Sketch: Terry-Thomas is hired to Make America Beautiful so Freddie the Freeloader moves his shack across the country. Music: Joanie Sommers sings "Girl Talk" and "When I'm Not Near the Boy I Love." Silent Spot: The old photographer pawns his camera to pay his rent, then gets customers.

E24. Parlor, Bedroom & Wrath

Mar 7, 1967 · 25m

Sketch: George Appleby (Red) arrives early for a high society party thrown by his old pals Mike and Pat Mahoney (Mickey Rooney and Martha Raye), entertainers who have struck it rich. The three start drinking before the other guests arrive. The polite gathering soon escalates into a wild bash. Music: Martha Raye sings "I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm" and "Happiness is Just a Thing Called Joe". The Silent Spot: Pierre the Beautician demonstrates some of the unusual beauty treatments that he gives his customers.

E25. Schnook of Araby

Mar 14, 1967 · 25m

E26. It’s a Treat to Beat a Cheat on the Mississippi Mud

Mar 21, 1967 · 25m

Sketch: A novice lawyer (Richard Chamberlain) defends his first client, San Fernando Red, on an income tax evasion charge. Music: Richard Chamberlain sings "Haven't We Met?" and "When I Fall in Love." The Silent Spot: Red pantomimes a light sleeper having a bizarre nightmare.

E27. A Bum for All Seasons

Mar 28, 1967 · 25m

E28. Next Time Try the Brain

Apr 4, 1967 · 25m

Clem Kadiddlehopper meets down on his luck Loser Lumpkin (guest Tennessee Ernie Ford), a once-great champion chicken-plucker who was in the Olympics. Observing that Clem has the fingers for it, Lumpkin takes him to the Olympics to break the world chicken plucking record. In "The Silent Spot," it's the day after Christmas and Red plays a man dealing with his contentious wife, who demands he take down the tree and the decorations.